a heart on the cover

Was hanging out with Louisa at the library today. She was busy thinking up achievements that aren't yakuza-related, so I wandered off to stare blankly at rows and rows of comforting fiction. Wanted to check if Watchmen finally hit the shelves. Also wanted to look for an illustrated Pinocchio so that I can reduce Yu Chen into a helpless pile of laughter. Wood can be so funny.

Turned into a random section and almost hit a guy. Looked up to say sorry. Behold. Lovely maroon binding.

MY MISTRESS'S SPARROW IS DEAD

One of the earlier poems of beloved Catullus.

Edited by JEFFREY EUGENIDES

I fell in love.

Love stories deemed worthy by the guy who wrote Middlesex.

Who bases his efforts on a young Latin poet infatuated with a married older woman.

This should be interesting.

Also, I have had many people asking me why I am so jobless these days. I'll have you know that I am not jobless. I am merely lonely. Sad, I know. Rub it in all you want.

a compromise

I want to update.

But

1 post = 2 episodes of anime!

How?

cameronian cranks

During my travels of late, I happen to notice that the women of Cameron Highlands generally have perfect complexions and willowy figures, characteristics that are highly prized by men. Therefore, I would like to urge readers who are looking for some high-altitude hanky-panky to extend their search hill-ward. Of course, I do not know if said beauties are partial to said hanky-panky, so that is something the reader should undertake at their own risk. The returns, however, are pleasurable. Unfortunately, the same cannot be said of the men.

Also, I would like to caution the inhabitants of a certain hotel about the towel rails in the bath. Do not drape the towels across the aluminium rod. Roll it and balance it on top. You do not want to yank too hard on said aluminium rod when you are still luxuriously steaming like a boiled lobster. The rod will come off and bounce right onto your foot to stamp a circle of blood like a cookie cutter cuts out a gingerbread man.

My blood staineth a twin of thee

And when your reflexes disregard the fact that you are in a wet bathtub and make you step back from the source of bodily injury, you invariably gain much more injury, in the form of a bruised butt and the cold hard steel of the bathtap trying to fuse with your spine.

Which is why I wonder why I have so many lustful couples as fellow lodgers. Ah. They probably never use towels. But there sure was a lot of them making out behind me as I poke the fireplace in the lobby. Toe-wrestling at the bar. Playing tag around the fountain. The brother was highly amused and would try to take pictures. In a particularly embarrassing incident, the whispering newlyweds started hugging in the lift. The brother snorted, pointed, elbowed me in the ribs, and I started laughing. Probably because the guy was shorter than the girl, but still. I feel like I have placed myself at a sub-oceanic level of maturity.

There you go, Yan. I am still capable of saying something without mentioning anime and manga. Aren't you proud of me?

cloudy concerns

The Five People You Meet in Heaven. Frankly, I've never really clicked with Albom's books because they need way more than seventeen years of (rather dull) memories to really strike a chord. But I am rather fond of the idea that you'll find out who really mattered to you in the end. It's a form of closure I've always expected Heaven to give. Not ideal, of course, but it is worth mulling over a hot cup of Milo.

It might sound a tad dramatic, but I couldn't finish the damn Milo today because I started wondering who will meet me in Heaven. Who will I matter to, in the end? Who will need me for a bit of perspective of their life?

Sadly, even if I greatly exaggerate my importance in any part of any person's life, I still cannot see myself as much of an influence on anyone. "Hey Suiying! I knew I'd be seeing you here! The way you complimented the lecturer taught me about sarcasm and it totally changed my life!". Not happening. Not even if God decided to stretch the number to 10.

Ah well. Guess that means I don't have to break from any ethereal ecstasies I will be enjoying.

I suppose if I really want someone to meet me, I can adopt a Somalian baby and give him electricity and homework instead of letting him yohoho his life away on the open seas. But that feels a bit like cheating, no?

I also like Albom's notion of Heaven because he never mentioned a Hell.

surprisingly useful side effects

When I was talking to a boring old lady today, I found a new ability. I made her talk in Japanese! So her droning about her precious son turned into sweet flowing Japanese pattering. Ahhh. Such a pleasant way to tune out.

Next, I'll try inserting subtitles.

She gave me oranges and told my aunt I was intelligent.

HAHA.